Seven Skills for Chronic Stress or Anxiety
Stress is common, and often unavoidable. Stress is generally caused by an external factor- your child is struggling in school, you have a work deadline, money is tight, or you had an argument with your spouse. When present in short, infrequent doses, stress can be good for problem-solving and performance. In healthy circumstances, once the external factor is resolved the stress goes away. If it doesn't resolve or your life feels like it is just one stress after another-- where you feel like you can never fully relax-- then you may be experiencing chronic stress or anxiety.
Chronic stress happens when you feel like you are constantly putting out fires and it takes a toll on your overall health and mood. Anxiety may be coming into play if you are feeling tense, worried, or like something bad is going to happen even if there is no immediate threat to you or your family. Both are problematic because they both effect your physical body, your relationships, and your ability to enjoy the moments of your life.
It can be helpful to learn what chronic stress or anxiety feels like for you. Each of us are different, but there are often various sensations that come up. Mentally, your mind might be racing and you have trouble turning it off. Physically, you may experience increased heart rate, feelings of restlessness, poor sleep, changes in eating habits, and stomach or digestive issues (many people may suffer from symptoms like constipation, diarrhea or IBS). I encourage my clients to practice learning what physical sensations arise in them so that they can recognize it early and implement helpful strategies as soon as possible.
No matter the cause, here are a few tangible tips to help you deal with anxiety or chronic stress.
Say it out loud
There is something so powerful about saying it out loud. "I am feeling anxious right now," or "This feels like my anxiety," or "I am noticing my mind is telling me I should be worried right now." Anxiety loves secrecy. When you can say it out loud to a trusted person, or even to yourself in the mirror, it takes away some of its power. If you don’t believe me, just give it a try.
Connect with others
Stress, anxiety, and overwhelm feed on isolation. Make it a priority to spend quality time with your partner, your children, or a close friend (even if it is virtual).
Get in the moment
Mindfulness means paying attention, on purpose, without judgement. Our minds can be like energetic puppies and often jump to worrying about the future or ruminating on the past. Spend 3-5 minutes each day in a quiet space noticing your breath in the present moment. If you have trouble with this (as we all will at times!) there are multiple apps or YouTube videos that can guide you.
Move your body
Whether you go for a walk, practice yoga, go to a gym, or have a dance party in your kitchen, physical movement is an excellent way to lift your mood.
Pay attention to what you pay attention to
If you notice that after watching the news or scrolling through social media you feel irritable, hopeless, sad, or restless then it’s a good indicator that you may need to limit what you are watching. Set a limit for 15 minutes of news per day and one hour or less of social media.
Make sleep a priority
Lack of quality sleep impacts us physically and mentally. When tired, you may notice your mind is foggy, you are more irritable, and you have a hard time focusing. Sleep is important, and often the first thing that suffers when we are stressed.
Give yourself some grace
The struggle can be real and sometimes things are just hard. When you are going through something difficult, stop and recognize that what you are feeling may be very normal and will quickly pass. However, if you realize that stress is impacting your quality of life, your parenting, or your relationships then that is a good indicator that it may be time to make a change.
If you feel that your relationship tendencies or patterns, chronic stress, anxiety, or mood concerns are getting in the way of quality relationships with your partner, children, or friends, there are options for change. Counseling may be a good way to address barriers, develop skills, and fully engage with the people you love. Through individual and couples counseling, I provide a specialized and modern approach to treatment in Woodland Park, Manitou Springs, Colorado Springs, and online therapy throughout Colorado.
