Five Things Effecting Mental Wellness That We Don’t Talk About Enough in Therapy
I have been a counselor for over ten years. It’s interesting to me that the longer I work with people on their struggles (and discover my own) the more I come to believe that a significant amount of mental stress can be reduced if we focus on a few areas not always discussed in therapy. This is not an exhaustive list, and it is not intended to suggest that improvement in these areas will rid a person of all struggles. It is, however, my belief that addressing any or all of these areas will only improve mood, stress, and overall life satisfaction.
Time Outdoors
At Exploration Counseling we discuss this all the time- “How much time are you spending outside?” The research is clear: the more time we spend outdoors the better our sleep, immune systems, stress, mood, attention, and connection. Most current research has stated that 120 minutes outside each week is significant for improvement in all these areas. Unfortunately, for many of us, that can be a challenging target to reach without being intentional about making it happen. Try eating meals outside, taking a walk while talking to a friend on the phone, utilizing outdoor seating at restaurants or coffee shops, growing a few plants on your deck or patio, or planning time at a park or hiking trail one afternoon. Time outside doesn’t have to be extreme, extravagant, or stressful. Keep it simple. Take your kids. Just get outside.
Clutter and Over-Consumption
This is a tough one for many, especially for families with children. However, in my clinical work and in personal experience, I can say quite assuredly that “things” often cause stress. We get overwhelmed with all the stuff in our homes. We stress about keeping things picked up and clean. We feel that it’s a never-ending cycle of constantly managing “things.” Our culture has taken on a belief that “more is more” and it is very apparent in the number of things we possess. There are so may books and articles written on this topic, so I won’t dive deep into it here. But I will put a few links to some books and blogs that I really enjoy, with practical thoughts on how to live with less. Know that you don’t have to become a minimalist to benefit from having fewer things. You may, however, realize that your stuff is causing more stress than joy, which when it comes to mental wellness is definitely something to address.
Blogs and Podcasts: The Life On Purpose Movement, No Side Bar, Becoming Minimalist, Simple Families, Minimal-ish
Books: The More of Less, The Minimalist Way
Financial Strain
Money. Money. Money. Financial uncertainty is one of the leading causes of stress in people’s lives. It’s also one of the top four topics couples argue about. More money does not equal more happiness- research has shown that for years. However, building a good relationship with money and living a life within your means does improve well-being and decrease stress. Money can be sensitive for some people, and we all have our own internal beliefs, stories, and assumptions about finances. Addressing these things in therapy while working to implement a financial system and lifestyle that works for you can be life changing.
A Packed Schedule
How often do you ask someone (anyone) how they’ve been and they something like, “We’re doing good…really busy!” or “I’ve just been so busy lately I feel like we’re always on the go.” Busyness has become a source of pride. We’ve come to believe if we’re not busy we’re not productive…we’re doing something wrong. We do too much. I’ll say it again. We do too much. Business and productivity are not the same thing. Running from one thing to the next stresses us out and it stressed out our children. We all need down time. We all need periods of doing nothing. Relaxing. Resting. You can get a pretty good idea if this is something you struggle with by a simple, one-hour experiment. Give yourself one hour to do nothing “productive” and nothing with technology. No screen time. No folding laundry. Just rest. Read a book. Snuggle. Lay in bed. Sit outside. See how difficult it is for you. Many of us will get fidgety, feeling that we should “go do that real quick” or want to reach for our phones or tablets. Resist the urge. If you notice this is hard, you probably notice it’s difficult for your children too (is “I’m bored” a quick phrase that comes out of their mouth?). Creating down time in our schedules is so important. Data shows it improves mood and stress, increases creativity and attention span in children, and allows for making more space todo what we want to do vs what we feel that we need to do. Having support and help, possibly from your counselor, in looking at your schedule to decide what aligns with your values and what might need to go can be a great way to start actually living your life the way you want to.
Screen Time
This one is not easy, but it’s simple. You are likely spending too much time on your phone or screens. Most of us are. Again, without intentionality around our devices, they can take over our time and attention. We talk a lot about screen time with kids and teens, but not as much with adults. I often ask clients how much time they’re spending on their phones and the number one response I get is, “too much.” We know it’s a problem. We know it’s taking away from our loved ones and connecting with what is right in front of us. It’s worth our attention to get serious about monitoring and limiting both the time we spend on screens and the content we consume while we’re there.
If any, or all, of these are areas you feel you struggle with (are they on your brain a lot?) then it is likely impacting your mental wellness. It’s possibly also impacting your relationships, parenting, and connection. It’s worth your time to discuss these topics and see if there are areas for change that align more with your personal or family values. Working with a qualified mental health provider can help with not only learning practical skills, but also better understanding your relationship with the difficulties you discover. Small changes can gift amazing results.
At Exploration Counseling, we provide outdoor and online therapy throughout Colorado and online therapy in Missouri. Reach out for any questions or request an appointment today.
